What can I say about this piece of trash that hasn't already been said? First off, let me state just how shocked (yet not that shocked) I am that Sunsoft would allow such a horrendous port to be made. Return of the Joker was lacking in a great many ways, but at least it looked and sounded amazing. This port for the Sega Genesis is just wretched. A sickening slice of bat-fuckery that has no business being seen and especially heard by others. Consider this the ultimate perk of the written review, you don't have to put up with the catastrophic sound-design. I can't emphasize enough just how BAD this game sounds. It's not just the music either. Every effect is incorrect, grating, and anything involving multiple sounds occurring at once is guaranteed to be the worst thing you ever heard.
So... uh... did this port get anything right? Nope!
I already stated in my Return of the Joker review that I fought the bosses on my terms. I took advantage of the game's mechanics to button-bash my way through every major fight. That... doesn't really work in the Genesis port. Most of the weapons were substantially weakened, erasing all but one quasi-viable strategy for every fight. Now, if you're as deranged as I and absolutely must play this, then get a controller with some turbo-functionally, set the auto-fire to max on your favorite emulator, whatever it takes. The 4-3 boss requires the homing weapon and almost two minutes of rapid-fire button presses. You can't use another weapon, and you certainly can't die, or else the boss becomes impossible. I think this is the worst fight I've ever been in, and I'm including the few that happened in real life. How could anyone involved in the production of this port think this was a good idea?
Sadly, I lost my taste for writing "clever" negative reviews eons ago. Back then, I might've been able to spit out another ten paragraphs detailing just how disgraceful this filth is, but that's not happening. You'll just have to settle for the bog-standard "Avoid at all costs!" rating.
There is nothing of value here.
Stay far away.
| Yikes! |

No comments:
Post a Comment