Picture the blandest arcade imaginable. It would have a boring title like Coin-up Games or Pixels. Nestled in-between classics such as Alleyway Battler and Ninja Stab, there would be Storm Blade. This is one of those games that is equal parts decent and forgettable. It has all of the necessary elements that make up a 2D shootemup, and doesn't make any attempt to wear out its welcome. It's also very shallow and not all that challenging.
The world is being threatened by nuclear weapons, so four nations come together to save the day. Everything from the plot to the level-design & bullet patterns are reminiscent of Aero Fighters. Unfortunately, the cast of this game isn't nearly as charming. There are four pilots to choose from, but they're a bunch of dorks that make goofy anime faces. It's hard to choose the best pilot, since they all seem equally overpowered, but Lucky should be everyone's favorite. No, not because he's flying for the USA. Lucky just happens to be the perfect name for making hilarious puns.
"Better Luck next time." "It was all Luck." "I'm feeling Lucky." "They were Lucky that I'm...oh..nevermind"
Anyway, there are six stages of vertically-scrolling action. The average play-through should take about 11 minutes. That's a little short for the genre, and other games tend to have more depth to them. Storm Blade offers bonus points for not using bombs, and destroying every enemy in the stage, but it's nothing out of the ordinary. To some gamers, that's a plus, especially if they're tired of memorizing complex scoring systems, while navigating a sea of neon-pink death. Although, there is a second loop, so that's something to look forward to.
There's not much else to say about this game. Expert STG-players will probably 1CC this game the very first time they play it. They'll say something like "Well, it wasn't horrible.", which is liable to be the extent of their thoughts on the game. This is not a game that will stick around for too long in somebody's memory. It's a shmup that serves a purpose. If someone time-traveled back to 1996, and they visited a movie theater, they'd probably play this game, while waiting for the flick to start.
Wednesday, September 14, 2016
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